Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Marie's Horrendous Trip

It was about two in the morning, and my family and I wear packing our car for the trip back to Wisconsin. We did not want to leave Pennsylvania again, but we had to. Suddenly from out on the driveway I heard a terrible screech as pieces of our luggage fell of the roof of the car. Sadly this was only the beginning of our terrible trip. Madison, Liz, Katlyn, A.J., my parents, and I all filed into the car. The weather outside was horrible, the clouds were pitch black and the rain was coming down so hard that we could barely see. Hours later, when we finally made it out of the storm, Liz wanted to play with her guinea pig that we had brought with us. I stared curiously at the animal, I didn't like very much, for it bit me every time I touched it. As soon as the guinea pig was craddled in my hands, I noticed it did not bite me when I picked it up, actually it hadn't moved at all. I screamed, knowing that the guinea pig was dead. Liz and Madison were both very upset about what just happened, we got out of the car and decided to burry the guinea pig at our next stop, Notre Dame. My family, Madison, and I all buried the guinea pig near the lake on campus. We were almost home. As we neared the wisconsin border, Liz yelled at us to pull the car over, but by the time we had gotten to a road stop, the dammage was already done. Covered in puke, Liz, Madison, and I walked out of the car. I promised myself at that moment, I would never get in another car with Liz again, but we had to make it home.

8 comments:

Liz said...

marie, your story is AMAZING! it is so well written and I LOVE IT! lol...really descriptive 2!
<3maggie

Liz said...

very funny, great story

-kevin

Liz said...

The wear in the first sentence is supposed to be were. Sorry about that.

*~Marie

Liz said...

That must have been horrible. When I lived in California we used to drive up to Utah to see all my grandparents. This one time when I was 3 or 4 my mom was driving back with us alone and she didn't close the box thing on top of our car right. I had just gotten a knew doll for Christmas and it got thrown out of car. Not as traumatic as everything that happened to you but very traumatic to a three year old.
Amanda

Liz said...

Great story. I really enjoyed it. great sentences.




~Megan Bixub

Liz said...

Marie,

Besides a few typos good story. You wrote using show vs. tell.

If you look at the paragraph again, do you think it could have used another paragraph?

Mrs. Kayzar

Marissa and Megan said...

OMG!!! marie that would stink to be covered in puke. When i was driving back from Ohio with my family my brother did the same thing, only it wasn't on me. It was all over him!! It was really gross. Good story though. Very well written.

Liz said...

That was really good marie but that problibly not alot of fun being covered in puke i'v never have been

^*^Shelbo^*^